Travel in Faith: Tools & Tips for Travel That Transforms You, Your “no one loves me” feelings will pass (unless you cling to and grow them!). Once we accept that we come by this inner critic honestly, we can start to separate it from our real point of view. One day, when I was experiencing personal issues of my own, I asked this friend: Do you like to be abused? Vitamin B1 deficiency is an extremely under-diagnosed illness today, presenting in hundreds of symptoms. If I start a FB page for us Lonely Hearts I’ll invite you and the others. It’s not an easy task, but once you find the right people it’s smoother sailing. People liked me so much, i was a popular person, but i just thought I am diffrent from others, I losed myself, I hated my self and after that people didnt like me too, they just say that you are unlikble right in front of me, at school, im 16, nobody likes me nobody loves me, and I refuse my parents, so they dont like me too, I wish I could understand the text but I am an english learner and I don’t know english this much well. When you feel like you never do anything right. It may bring us up too! You are six or twelve or fifteen and you look in the mirror and you hear a voice so awful and mean that it takes your breath away. I’ve read lots of articles, but most feel kind of preachy. I hope it will make my life worth living again. I don’t understand why people don’t like me, I’m not an ugly girl, I’m not mean, and I don’t know what I’m doing wrong. People do seem to dislike me a lot less if I interact with them in small doses. For years I have made myself available for errands and household repairs only to discover that my suspicions were correct..I WAS being snubbed. I have literally been told by almost everyone I meet that nobody likes me. You must dedicate your life to change. You are awake and alive. Someone who will listen to you without judgement. I’m not looking for pity, I just needed to share my feelings with someone other than my husband and dogs. I recently found out that I am on the autism spectrum, high functioning, what used to be called asberger syndrome. I avoid mirrors as much as possible and rarely go out without make-up on because of my acne. It didn’t seem like they remembered doing so. We argue all the time its physically draining. I am getting much better but still battle with these emotions and feel that God Is showing me that I will never truly find happiness trying to relate to people. To me, this makes a lot more organic sense than doing battle with ourselves. How else would we know the way we feel, and be here trying to fix our, “ills” in a society of “ills”. It’s just the truth. For me I’ve always been a sort of a black sheep and felt very different than other people. I offers her and her brother a drink on Wednesday but as soon as she goes alone to her brothes they end up drinking even though they said they had enough two days and don’t want me around. I’m a unique and worthy person who deserves friendship. Whether its old “friends”, family, or coworkers it doesn’t work out I worthless to others especially the ones that went to college or has an important job & has what seems the life I wanted for myself and kids. I feel this way on how people treat me.. and like you so very well put, treated by people who claim to love me. It hurts deeply! I feel that I have to demand to get anything like attention and never given anything for free. They are just beer buddies and coffee mates. In me, and I only have 3 ‘friends’ here, one is just a competitive jerk, the other is obsessed with herself, and the other is way too young and hyper. So we’re constantly battling feelings of loneliness, unworthiness, and unlovability.” – from How to Stop Believing the “Nobody Loves Me” Lie. I think I have a deep dark ugliness side that people see and don’t want me around. I like to pretend I’m tough and that I’m fine but I feel like a tub of icecream. I have a very thin plastic barrier to protect myself from getting hurt but it isn’t very durable and so people decide to stick their spoons in my icecream where it hurts. I did find the article true, though, if you listen to the critice, you won’t be yourself, and that can turn people off..(fulfilling a self-prophecy)..they may feel uncomfortable and not know how to react to it well. Dora is smart. A belief is a thought that we’ve been attaching to, often for years.”. Then I have others telling me that they didn’t think my father reported me they said yeah he knew but it had to be someone else or I need to forgive & get peace & try to have a relationship with my father that I wasn’t close to either of my parents but I felt like I was being told it was me not my parents or anyone else. My issue is with grown children. I’m literally crying reading posts that so many people have been told “nobody likes you”. I didn’t realize it…but like the article said, the repetition lead me to become these things even more. Hans. I’m no good at confrontation and so I walk away!! We often hate things in other people that we unknowingly hate about ourselves. But I will stick up for or defend myself. You may believe you have enough love for both of you, and you may even think love conquers all! The pain was just too much. I pushed it aside for probably the first time ever and forced myself to read on knowing I was in desperate need of insight and relief. I dont know if I using colorism on this forum is ok so I’ll keep it brief. bout how can we connect? Why did you stay? I am 60 years old, married, moved to warmer climate in a 55+ community hoping to meet people like me. On the odd occasion I have made a friend, I sabotage it because I don’t understand why anyone would want to be friends with me – I am awkward, shy, boring, feel really dumb and don’t bring anything exciting to conversations. All I can say is if anyone needs that miracle its YOU. Maybe it was but I just wanted to spend an hour with them. I have also learn to forgive fast…. Unfortunately it seems that the more you give to a loved one the more they take, the less you ask for the less they give to you. I don’t want to blame myself so I end up crying, trying to find on why I am so sad about that. I’m reading all of this and realizing that life just doesn’t work out for all of us huh. Because apart from the people who work for me, there are no other humans who I come into contact with. Over thinking i feel is a disorder.I found out that when you start thinking, you just need to take long breaths and concentrate on breathing.Your brain cannot think and concentrate on breathing at a same time. My family see me as a problem , now I am at uni , it’s like they want me to stay and never darken their doorstep again , I am doing ver well at uni , but I am so lonely soo lonely , this can’t be normal . I’m in my early 30s and I suffer from extreme social anxiety and I have no friends. Is that where I belong?”. It is what it is right now. I need to learn to be alone and be happy alone. I don’t ever think of her as a demon. And I’m just SO LONLEY!! Just be alone! Thanks for sharing . I think this article is pretty accurate in the way it describes how we come to see the world and other people through the lens of loneliness and shame so many feel, however I think the article fails to address that we don’t live in a world that is fair, equal or caring and compassionate and for peopled labeled as different or “other” this becomes their reality. I already tried auto suggestion that I am pretty and smart and well deserved but the reality shows me something very different. No matter what your inner critic is telling you or using to reinforce its arguments that you’re different or unworthy, you can find ways to access the strength to calmly quiet this destructive coaching and be persistent in moving toward your goals. I see people in bad relationships when they should be millionaires with the sweetest husband or wife. I was never popular but had some friends. People can be selfish jerks! Everybody wants to report everybody about any lil thing. Sadly I’ve been feeling “nobody likes me.” since I was a kid. When I owned that, it was totally freeing. People don’t like me but I have stopped trying to figure out how, or try and find my value in pleasing them (yes i’m a people pleaser). I don’t know why though. No, I won’t involve them in my life unless they make an effort and I am legitimately interested in spending time with them. My issues did start as a child with bullies who taunted me everyday and a younger brother who joined in the public humiliation and bullying. There are five important steps to overcoming this inner critic. I struggle too with those inner critics, it isn’t easy but, it is important to turn it around, think of yourself as an important and rare jewel. Every Christmas I stayed at my parents house bc that’s what they wanted, I knew they wouldn’t come to me dispite my numerous invitations. I hope it helps. I feel so alone but I feel like if I talk about it then people will feel like Their dragging me around just having to handle me without wanting to help. Now most women today just want a MR. RICH type of a man instead of an ordinary man, since they just want the very best of all and will never settle for less. I’m learning how I need to be loved. I wish I could see how other people view me because from my point of view, I’m the worst. This article does an admirably accurate job describing how awful this experience feels emotionally. Also, if they were so lonely, why didn’t they respond to texts, calls, emails, or mail? I always have negative thoughts and visions and always imagine the worse. Most people feel like an outcast on some level. Lucie, I could have written this myself. And fully expect you to just suck it up and take what you get; all is well when you say nothing & let most of the crap go in one ear & out the other. I’m so insecure now and have no confidence and I know the inner voice is right. I’m not sure if I like them, let alone the other way round. My mother in law told me one time that I needed to take turns going to others holiday events since we were going to so many & it might’ve been cutting on her time & I thought about it & I said yeah that’d be great & I specified by saying they would be one year for Christmas, my mom one year & my dad another & she quickly told me no that wasn’t what she was talking about she wasn’t excluding them just my parents because I was the one that came from a split up you know broken home. I’m a senior in high school and for some reason I really don’t fit in. I spend most weekends alone in the house. I’m sad and cry all the time which doesn’t help heal. Some of us walk the path of life completely and utterly alone – and not by choice – it’s agony every day. I literally thought to myself that I must just have one of those personalities that people don’t like. I don’t let people get to close to me and don’t trust people. When I work I have no problem cutting up with people and building relationships. And for the women that are very independent now which most of them really don’t need a man anymore. Yes I’m one in that category. Your age,job status are all circumstances in your life. There are endless battles to be fought, and many people quit after just losing one. I can’t even get out of the tub without help. And that your kids don’t get invited places because nobody wants YOU around? I feel so isolated. One won’t speak to me at all even after having contact for a while after the divorce. Happiness is (mostly) a choice. If its not us, then it must be them because its awful and its really happening. Jesus. Is what I said unforgivable? I miss having someone to love. No one is “un-likable.” I assure you that. I don’t know of a way that I can get out of this dilemma but reading the comments on this website has made me realize I’m not the only one that feels worthless at times. I help out in group works, help people when they ask me to, smile and be polite, but I don’t understand how these qualities aren’t enough to gain me a friend. My “demon” voice is always telling me “you’re not good enough”. If you already know how you give and receive love and you still feel like no one loves you, read When You Don’t Feel Good Enough to Be Loved. Thank you so much John! i’m a people pleaser. I just try and be the best me – despite my depression voice telling me I’m nothing and spend most of my energy on me, trying to live through each day. I try to change things with no results. I have also tried therapy but I really didn’t get much out if it. I’ve tried anxiety meds and even mood meds (cua the doc said perhaps i was cyclothymic).. but idk nothing has worked and man alive, it gets hard to keep positive about it when I’ve tried soo hard so many times to snap out of this, always with success first, but then with ultimate failure and rejection. I deeply appreciate your thoughts and it made a lots of sense to me. Or when my first wife was always “tired” after work and on the weekends. I never disclosed my condition for fear of ridicule, I tried confiding in my boss and he doesnt get it, he also treat me differently now and I don’t like it. But it ends there. It is essential for a parent to show their kids love even when they act too grown up for it. Oh I do relate to you , we try but would like to be heard too . I cannot beg. I try hard meeting people, I try hard pleasing people. If you or someone you know is in crisis or in need of immediate help, call 1-800-273-TALK (8255). I feel the exact same way. They may appear to have 1000’s of friends, but may go home and just feel as empty as this article talks about. My heart breaks for you as I read your words. I’m scared to reach out for help again because more than likely the same thing will happen. I believe in you. In other words, we may be far more likely to notice the one time someone doesn’t invite us out versus the five times they did. Should I hold my breath for love? It’s my fault that I’m not extroverted, smart, outgoing, attractive, smart or that one of my eyes isn’t straight. I Found out through facebook that 3 friends went out for the day and didn’t invite me even though they know I’m lonely so this has devastated me. Thanks Psychalive this actually really helped me! The problem is, that this stays with you, and months later, you are still thinking about it. In… Read More »5 Signs of God’s Blessing on Your Relationship. Sarah is right…this sounds like an abusive relationship. You are going through a bout, a phase, a season. Why is this happening? Get away from these sick crazy people. But I then I developed that guilt & regret & stupid& sorrow toward myself & how I am made to feel. When I was around 10 I made up my inner voice and named her Canny, but she’s more of a harsh but loving friend. One of the best ways to see signs of God’s blessing on your relationship is to look at a marriage that wasn’t blessed by God. Maybe you’re grieving a breakup or loss, or you’re lonely or homesick for the past. Sometimes I just don’t get the world, and why it’s like this for me. I’d much rather have someone say they like me at first blush than to say they don’t. There is an older person who told me that they were lonely and that they would miss me when I moved on to other ventures. What if your HUSBAND thinks you’re boring? My biggest concern is that one day my own children will hate me too , Thats exactly how I feel like if everyone around me is annoyed or bothered by me that by the end of the day I feel like the most loneliest person ever . Before you jump on the “no one loves me” train, define what love means to you. Go to any nursing home and tell me loneliness is a state of mind…please!! What to Do When You Feel Like No One Loves You. God made women beautiful, and that’s that. I think we’re conditioned by society to feel we need to spend time with others and have times of good fellowship. Perhaps there is something unacceptable about me but I have given up trying to understand it and that in itself is liberating! This would make it easy for them to ignore you and make you feel like you’re not worth their time. I finished my BS in biology and got into pharmacy school and got my doctorate degree there. Even if you had these things, then what? I look myself in the mirror and cry and encourage myself that I’ll be fine. Your relationship sounds alot like the last one I was in. I help people and I find my presence refreshing. I have no children . I’m thinking about it. Quite a change in the women today unfortunately, from the old days when most women were never like today at all. Jane…you are an awesome person! I’m financially very stable. I hate it here. I know it’s the opposite of an ideal situation, but somehow I happen to find your comment refreshing. Now we at least have internet so you can discuss your interest in a group or something. Either they weren’t my type or vice versa. You need support. I think you are absolutely right about me trying hard. Just talk about your lack of confidence. It’s not about putting myself down, it feels like acknowledging the human condition, my human condition. We have one life! But nobody likes me. I can’t tell you not to let it affect you, because it will, and it has! Resistance is a form of energy, and energy makes things grow. The fact that others don’t hang out with you is more about who they are, then it is about you. This understanding will help you get through a bout of feeling unloved and unwanted. When you allow yourself to dwell on those feelings, you feel even worse about yourself and your life! Also we tend to get judged by how we look subconsciously by other people so play dumb, give a compliment, especially to other women & try out a new look see what happens. This is ridiculous, how can u say its not based in reality and then say most people experience it? However, I notice you mentioned things like, “when your friend doesn’t text you back right away”. Now I feel like the only thing that I miss to find peace is to know why. BULL$%^#. This article described my problems perfectly There are people who care about you. My boyfriend has had enough and he’s ended up depressed because of me. I don’t understand why no one love me or care about me , no one ask about me or care about what I felling or what I wan’t , every one aspect to have my attention or services or what ever it was without any think about me . No one wanted to know why I did some things. I fear many of us are squandering our efforts on those who wouldn’t make good friends to begin with… Now I’m 68 and stopped dating or trying since the last man who I spent 2 years with left with my money. Always solitary, always alone , I can’t stand it anymore , glad I found this site , I was in sheer desperation last night . All the rules about asking people about themselves and keeping talk of myself limited doesn’t mean anything apparently. And before anyone tells me I’m being judgemental(or whatever) you need to know I am speaking from experience. I’ve given up now. Now years later her other kids can have trouble her son can marry a divorced woman with a teen boy that the woman supposedly was abused, her daughter can split with her husband but somehow it isn’t her daughter’s fault it’s all the husband, her grandkids can split with their baby daddy, but no one else is supposed to bring in anyone else from a split home like my oldest daughter boyfriend that his parents split when he was young. Hi guys. Start to notice when your thought process shifts and your inner critic starts to invade your mind. I had to force myself to continue reading it at a point because the voice said this isn’t going to do you any good and it is too thick for you. I told her she better watch my kids & best better not let anything happen to any of them if I had to leave them with her to watch & she gets insulted & feels people are judging her even if it’s news people talking about the free range (roam) parenting because she did that & you just can’t be a spy on them 24/7. Well, nobody likes me, either. It is not true that no one cares about me. I’m in my 50s and it’s all very hard for me. It’s prob not everybody and I bet it’s your mom trying to have power over you . I feel so lonely. You sound like a great , loving person! I just don’t get it. Love -- kindness, affection, sensitive attunement, respect, companionship -- is not only difficult to find, but is even more challenging…, One of the most fascinating things about working in psychology is the chance to explore the invisible forces that shape…, The tabloids and reality TV shows documenting the erratic, out-of-control behaviors associated with drinking and drugging may be giving us…, In our second Experts at Home conversation, Dr. Lisa Firestone talks with mindfulness expert Dr. Donna Rockwell. im feel alone and i feel no body like me i so sad i dont known why i sad or alone i need to tell my dad and mom but i dont tell because im secard to tell this i dont know to should toto tell it. It’s not your fault that that happened to you. This person immediately got up and moved away from me. I could care less if I see God rewarding me. Invisible in a conventional context … always seconds at work, social & family whatever the occasion they just put up with me. I’d love to have a beer with just us, just us lonely f*****s. I don’t know you at all. Byron Katie’s “The Work” is a powerful way to change how we think about feeling like no one loves us. Even my family, who I give everything to, seems to not like me. Sometimes, it operates like a subtle, shaded filter through which we perceive the world. Don’t wait for someone to spell it out to you. I really mean it, I don’t have family or relatives. I really relate to it. I’ve been told that people are just to busy to make new friends. I am awkward during conversations. People don’t mind if I am around, they seem to actually enjoy my presence so I’m not like a hated villain or anything. I’m very light skinned but both my parents are black. Why was it wrong when I said and did that? Has anyone thought if everyone here became friends how many friends we would all have! Are they just pandering me because they pity me? Never really thought of it as a demon but that’s a Good analogy . I had an awful unhappy childhood where both my parents didnt want me or loved me and one just didnt want to know me, but the other brought me up resentfully with a lot of cruelty. Best of luck finding the diamonds in the rough . It has helped me be able to look at the voice as something separate from me instead of it being me which is a great start. Just keep looking for one another. Right now my boss only included my coworker in meetings, planning, and we do the same exact job. In my team no girls ever talk to me, I was very lonely so I quit. I see people with bad parents when they should have the kindest and most friendly parents in history. I imagine that you have been hurt deeply as I have. #mc_embed_signup{background:#fff; clear:left; font:14px Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; } While I was there, I had to take a pill to go to sleep. As Dr. Lisa Firestone put it in her article “A Way Out of Loneliness,”  “It’s helpful to recognize that loneliness is very much a state of mind, and unfortunately, that mind is, in effect, lying to us.” Being alone isn’t necessarily the issue; it’s the filter of seeing ourselves as alone that must be challenged. For instance, to build a happy family, family members must experience deep affection, loyalty, and a healthy attachment. The one person that helps me all the time is Dr Carolina leaf look her up on you tube she really has help me so much ! As a Christian I prayed but I could not feel better about being me. When someone doesn’t make eye contact with us, it says, “See? So much of this article explained the inner thoughts. There were functions happening & third parties would make me aware of them after the fact, as why I wasn’t there which made me look like I wasn’t interested. Have I done wrong yes but I’m the only one getting punished. I have wanted to die ever since I was 9 my father the one that is the one who keeps you safe, killed my childhood innocence and my will to live by abusing me and my older sister. I feel like if I disappeared no one would miss me. I can’t even word this to make my point because I tried meds for depression that left me a mess I found that when I was younger even though I was knowledgeable I asked opinions and listened that made me popular. I cry sometimes because I feel very very lonely insight. Again, I would like to thank you for your thoughts and hope one day I will figure out what is wrong with me. I just wanted to thank you for being so kind to me during high school..the way you invited me to sit with you at lunch without even caring about the "popular" kids who were snickering and laughing at you for being nice to me. When I had enough, and dedicated every single moment, right now, to being in control of my thoughts and emotions, I started seeing real results. But I am so sensitive that I couldn’t control myself from crying. Even when I walk down the sidewalk in my city, people never move aside to let me by – I’m pretty sure because I’m invisible to them. I’ve had social anxiety since as long as I can remember. I have borderline personality disorder and the voice has completely taken over. Why when I’m in a bad mood or grumpy or pissed does anyone ask are you ok? Yes that’s true I have also many problems? I’m only now just starting to realize it after 15 years of failure. Are right about me it 's hard sometimes to feel no one loves me not even my family way I do know ’... 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